How To Maintain A Nice Doggy Smile

Dentastix are my preferred method when it comes to keeping my teeth gleaming and white. As you can see making sure you get rid of all the plaque means extreme concentration.Once you've nibbled with your front teeth clean your incisors, don't stop until they're sparkling. And whatever you do, make sure you don't forget those pesky back teeth.

A Biscuit? Thank You.

As you can see my sitting like a good boy technique paid off. If you need me I'll be in bed, stuffing my face. I'm such a lucky boy!

Biscuit Please

Like Old Mother Hubbard's cupboard my biscuit tin has been empty for the past few days. It's not as if I haven't been a good boy (except for the soon to be blogged about Scalextric car incident). I keep hearing phrases like "Damn it! We forgot the dog biscuits" so yesterday I commenced my plan.

Just as Derren Brown tonight will be trying to turn the nation into 'Psychic Spies' I have been practising my mind control techniques using the 'sit like a good boy and stare' technique. Here's how you do it: repeat after me:

GIVE ME A BISCUIT. GIVE ME A BISCUIT. GIVE ME A BISCUIT.

Morning Cheer

I'm an angel, ask anyone and they'll tell you. you only have to look at me. Here, look:It's just sometimes I have a cheeky side, a playful side. Unfortunately, it's not always well-received. Take this morning, for instance. I got out of the door to get into the car far the usually drive to my Granny's. My mummy looked sleepy and a bit annoyed so I thought I'd cheer her up while also waking her up with a little bit of fun. Mummy opened the car door.

"Dudley, get in" she said, as she always does.

I took this as my cue to run around the garden skipping merrily past my Mummy.

"Dudley, get in" she said, angrily.

'Oh, I get it' I thought, 'she doesn't get it's a game' So I ran to the car door, then shot back round the garden for another lap. Daddy had come out of the house now to start up his motorbike and was also shouting at me to get in the car.

"Dudley, get in, or I will go without you" she said, growling at me through her teeth and starting the engine. I took another lap around the car.

Mummy and Daddy suddenly saw the fun side of this game and started laughing loudly so I ran straight into the back seat of the car wagging happily.

All Work And No Play

I'm not impressed. Everyone's back to work, I much prefer holidays.